There Aren’t Enough Cuss Words

Hey! Did I get your attention? Well, I am feeling full of explicits at the moment. Why? Probably for the same reason we are all feeling full of explicits. Even those of us who don’t use them. As of late, it does feel like there aren’t enough cuss words. For the record, I love them and utilize them often as sentence enhancers. If you are offended, look away or skim past the bad words. I think we are all edgy and as a friend recently said, a little extra. My way of expressing myself is via my words but I don’t want to start blowing up my social media feeds with all of this. I’ve decided to rant and leave it here.

Maybe this post will not speak to you and maybe you fully disagree. That’s OK. You can leave here, you can unfollow me. You can make assumptions that I am pushing an agenda. Again, all of that OK as that is your interpretation. I’m speaking my heart. I’m tired. Tired of the divide. Tired of things like being ready to go to war to fight for our country but being anti a vaccine that might save the person right next to you. I don’t get the hypocrisy that is surrounding us.

I try so hard to be an optimistic person. I’m a glass half full kinda girl. I try to respect the feelings and opinions of others. What I don’t respect is bullshit. What I don’t respect are people who don’t care about things like the health and well being of those around them. What I don’t respect is people who refuse to get a vaccine because they don’t know what they are putting in their body yet they have breast implants and get botox on the regular. Breast implants are making woman sick. Research it. I’m not bullshitting you.

Fear of something unknown. This is also a big reason why people aren’t getting vaccine. I have respect for that. It feels like a legitimate reason. I feel for you. Vaccines aren’t my favorite, truth be told – I am terrified of the needle. TERRIFIED. Like please don’t talk to me about my tetanus booster. I want to cry just thinking about it. When this new vaccine for this new virus that is causing a pandemic came out, I wasn’t jumping up and down for it. Then time passed and it felt like the lesser of the evils for what I could see this virus was capable of, especially now as we watch it mutate. I went from not knowing many people who had it to knowing a lot of people who’ve had it in just the past month. Some have mild cases, some have been hospitalized or worried that they might be. This is not media, this is people I know! The way the numbers have shifted just in my own social circle has changed dramatically since this all started over a year ago.

I read a lot. I talk to people on both ends of the spectrum. I am respectful of choices but I am not super understanding of lack of logic. When it feels like a political choice instead of one based on logic and compassion, you’ve lost me. I’m super good at side stepping bullshit as I don’t want to argue with people who’s views differ than mine as that is not the big problem right now. Except it is. Sigh. As humans, we’ve always had different opinions. It’s the way that the world turns but right now, we are so extra opinionated and so fucking divided. Also, what you read or watch can lean one way or the other so be careful with that or yes, you will have a very skewed interpretation of so many things.

Yesterday morning I read an Instagram post by Jen Hatmaker who might be one of the most thoughtful and well written humans of all time. Yes, I do feel that strongly. I adore her words on all the things but today, what she wrote, felt extra important. I am sharing it here for you to read. She is heavy on the love and general compassion for mankind.

I got the shot. Twice. My arm hurt like hell and I got sick with the second shot. Sick for 36 hours. I felt awful but 36 hours compared to weeks? I’ll take it. Now we have a variant and a lot more people are getting sick. I’ve heard of 4 today and knew 2 hospitalized last week. These folks? Not vaccinated. Now I also know several who were vaccinated but aren’t as sick. If we are paying attention, hospitals are full. The numbers of vaccinated versus not vaccinated who get hospitalized is more than just a subtle difference in numbers. Doesn’t that speak volumes?

Yes, so many get sick and are asymptomatic. Maybe they spread it someone who isn’t as lucky and requires an ECMO machine. Maybe that person dies. Am I being dramatic or realistic? I guess it depends on what you’ve experienced or witnessed first hand.

Also, kids are getting sick. Kids who can’t get the vaccine cause they aren’t old enough or, kids whose parents are choosing not to get them vaccinated so getting sick isn’t their choice. Split households also have some kids not getting vaccinated. I have seen that conflict first hand and I don’t envy that disagreement. One parent says, “Do it” and the other says, “Don’t”. Sigh. This is a lot to digest.

It seems we’ve got a lot of pieces to this puzzle. We’ve also got a lot of very strong opinions and honestly, a lot of people are showing some ugly colors these days. Both ‘sides’ are guilty of this. I don’t want to stand on a political platform as that really shouldn’t have relevance when it comes to a global pandemic that is filling our hospitals and killing people. A lot of people are standing on a hill and waving their flag about their rights. What does that even mean right now? What does that look like when you or someone you love gets sick and needs care but the hospitals are full?

Also, I’m hearing a lot of talk of how the vaccine doesn’t stop people from getting sick. Maybe not but it might stop you from dying. That seems worth it to me. Do you know what else isn’t a 100% guarantee but millions of people use it? Birth control. Or medications. A lot of us put medications in our body every single day and we all have a different reaction to them, Isn’t that called science? Aren’t we all a science experiment due to our different genetic make-up?

Here’s the thing, not one single thing is 100% effective. Hell, life itself isn’t guaranteed but if you can do something to prolong life, to be here for the ones you love and those who would be left here broken-hearted and picking up the pieces if something happened to you, wouldn’t you want to do that? I sure would!

I had a conversation recently with someone who’s wife was asking her mom’s doctor what would happen if her mom got Covid. This mom lives with her daughter and son in law who aren’t vaccinated. I am not sure if the mom with her multiple health issues is. Would she be hospitalized? The answer was no. My friend was baffled at this response. Why? Well, first of all there is a line of really, really sick people who actually might die if they are not admitted. Also, if you are anti getting this vaccine but think you deserve to be treated ahead of those who tried to protect themselves and the ones around them, doesn’t that feel wrong? It sure seemed wrong when I heard it.

Last week, we had an altercation between a parent and a teacher over face masks at our local elementary school. Yes, it made the news and well, that was embarrassing. Apparently a parent wasn’t happy that their child had to wear a mask and it escalated from there. Oh, and all of those Next-door and Facebook posts where people get on their high horse about how people should parent? It starts here folks. This dad was a shining example to his child and likely so many others who witnessed this behavior.

I get that there is frustration, I am obviously feeling that as well as I type this cuss word loaded post. I guess the question is, who are we taking things out on? A principal of a school who is just doing her job? The person who runs the local Facebook watch pages and shares information based on county statistics or info that comes at them via an emergency scanner? Everyone wants to blame someone and sometimes, we stop giving a fuck of who gets in our path. That’s sad. How do we keep our morals intact and also remember that everyone around us is a person who is likely trying to make sense of what really makes no sense at all right now? Some are losing focus on these key elements: Kindness and humanity.

Also, can we talk about social media just for a second? It’s a crapshoot on any given day as to whether I love it or hate it and I think a lot of us can relate. Over the past year, it felt like you were an asshole for not taking a stance on things or you were an asshole for taking a stand. Did you follow that? Yeah, me either 😉 I just read this awesome post about exactly that – to be or not be and it’s well worth the read. Especially if you have a lot of opinions on what influencers should or shouldn’t be sharing. Also, the person who wrote it is more of a design influencer but she does touch on social news that is close to her heart in a very non in-your-face kind of way.

Recently, I’ve unfollowed a few people. Not because their views didn’t match mine BUT because of the fucking redundancy. How much can we say the same thing over and over. It’s making me insane. Like, stop talking! When we follow people, it’s usually cause something pulls us in and when you lose that because you are all of a sudden beating a dead horse (excuse the phrase) about things that weren’t what you were about before, bye. But guess what? Not everyone will be your cup of tea and that is totally OK too. Follow and unfollow as needed. Maybe you follow political feeds cause that’s your wheelhouse but when people who are about yoga or home decor start going on and on about their stance on things? #bye

This morning I received an email from a former yoga teacher titled, Facing Powerless Puppet Syndrome. Oh, #delete I mean, you don’t agree with the vaccine but if I do, I’m a puppet. Fuck off. This is the kind of bullshit that just feels exhausting. This also wasn’t the first post with this message from this person. Unsubscribe. Done. Also, if we really want to analyze the ‘puppet’ thing (like dig deep here), aren’t we all puppets following dictation from somewhere? We all get our info from someone. Maybe it’s how we were brought up, maybe it’s the news, maybe it’s social media, maybe it’s the bible, maybe it’s the constitution. We are all engrained with things.

Somewhere we ‘learn’ things and maybe just maybe, it’s OK to unlearn and relearn? Here is what I would suggest. Read, listen, talk – but listen, this is where it can get sticky. There are a lot of opinions out there. Opinions aren’t facts. How about people who have lived these supposed stories? The ones who live in war ravaged countries, the ones who’ve lost loved ones to Covid. All of our opinions are often times based on opinions. Yes, we are also entitled to have those. Might I also suggest thoughtful conversations? Not ugly finger pointing behind a screen.

I was listening to a podcast and the guest was saying how no one has an internal voice anymore. How true is that? Everyone has an opinion and sometimes those aren’t articulated in the most thoughtful of ways. Imagine that the person you’ve decided to berate on social media was standing in front of you, would you speak your words differently? I’d be willing to bet that most of you would. Some wouldn’t and those ugly hearted people are not my people. Yes, I might be fiery and spew cuss words but dammit, I will drop everything to hug you when you are weary.

This world is a mess. A pandemic, ugly politics, wars, bombings, climate change and natural disasters have us in a tailspin. What is happening? It feels like the Earth is speaking to us but are we listening? The earthquake in Haiti with the death toll and damage is heartbreaking. The unrest in Afghanistan is gut-wrenching. As Billy Joel said, We Didn’t Start The Fire but wow, are we adding kerosene or what? 2020 and 2021 could write their own history book.

Trust me – I have a whole lot of opinions about a whole lot of things but who’s mind am I changing? Likely nobody’s and I’m not here to attack the character of others but I sure do wish more people would get vaccinated. We are honestly so lucky to live in America. Land of the Free because of the Brave. We have so many things at our disposal. I wake up everyday feeling so grateful for so much. I know I am fortunate. For employment, for a roof over my head, a table to eat at, food to eat and healthcare. How lucky am I? Many of us are this fortunate and do we take any of it for granted? Sadly, I think many people do.

Thank you for sticking around for my brain dump. I hope you are well and doing the best you can for yourselves and the people around you. Love hard + be kind.